Journal #12: "Twelve Discussing the End of Twelve"

My grade 12 year has been the best yet for me, by far. It's to grasp the fact that I, along with the rest of the people that I've seen and been grouped with for the last four years, will be graduating so soon. Most of them will be leaving the city, for school, for careers, for simply kick-starting the rest of their life. I think it's a little more overwhelming than most people think about in passing. I'm coming back for grade 12b, meaning I'll be staying one more year in this dirty city. I have begun thinking about how strange it will feel not seeing everybody's faces, and knowing they are off, living new experiences at the same time I'm still experiencing the same living conditions. It's my choice, however. I really couldn't see myself being ready to leave only two months from now. There are still things I'd like to do here. I'm not finished with it yet. Next year, it'll all be about my passions; my music, my writing, my life. I'm excited in a way. But also a bit overwhelmed.

I'm sure everyone has experienced these kind of feelings when graduating and leaving high school. I still even hear people say that they miss being in high school. Well, I don't think that I'll miss it, but I know that I will always look back on everything that happened, and smirk about how crazy, or how stupid, or how wise, or how insensitive we all were at one point, hoping that we've all learned our lessons by now. I plan on moving to Toronto to pursue my career as a recording artist. I'm not worried about money; I know that money will work out somehow, and that I'll find a way, even though everyone gets a little stressed over money sometimes. I'm also not worried about school. Why should I be? As it is, I think college may even be a waste of my time. If I don't get in, I'm just going to take it as a sign that I'm not meant for the school curriclum (which is how I like it) and that it's just simply not my path in life. No worry, no sadness, no anger shall be generated from silly things like money, or school. The journey is most important to me in my life, and it's increbily exciting to think about the things that life could and will bring to me. I hate having everything planned out like a map. Life wasn't meant to be lived like that. I don't want to know how I'm gonna get what I want, or where I want to be. I'll take it as I go; that's all you can do. I wish my fellow classmates happiness and success.